Art Of Business

Gleb Danilov

Two ears and one tongue are given us to listen more and talk less. Normally we speak more than listen. The most important subject in the world is what we are talking about. That is so typical! We try express ourselves quickly. We behave ourselves as if it were our final talk in life. One American psychologist said that “a conversation – is a competition in which the first one who holds the breath is announced to be a companion”.

The art of listening to the companion is one of the most important habits in communication. Usually we pay little attention to that fact. Some people have got a talent for listening. But most of mere mortals must learn this art passing through the real thorns and breaking well-established habits. You should show a genuine interest in people and what they say while getting professional listening skills.

Two rules of communication

1. A 45-year old man addressed to psychologists. He wanted to learn how to behave in a dialogue. He was going to organize his own business. Thus, communication skills were obligatory for working with clients.

So, he came to psychologists and spent three hours speaking about his future plans and abilities he wanted to develop. When the “conversation” ended, he said:

- You are such good guys, I learned so many nice things from you! I want you to have special sessions with my subordinates!

They smiled and said:

- Tell us, what exactly is this new we told you?

It turned out that he spent three hours talking about him. The psychologists were only listening to him but left the impression of very pleasant companions. Finally, this man realized a very important rule of communication.

<strong>Rule number one: The best companion is not someone who can speak well, but the one who knows how to listen well.</strong>

2. There was an exercise performed on a psychological training in a group. The participants were divided into pairs. The coach gave a task to everyone to talk to a partner on a given topic.

The pairs started to work. And then the most comical thing happened. The subject was unique for very person: “ice cream”, “building materials”, “cosmetics” and “machine guns” and so on. Everyone pulled the blanket on himself or herself. It was very similar to the conversation between deaf and blind men. As a result the group came to final conclusion.

<strong>Rule number two: People tend to listen to each other only after they have finished their own talk.</strong>

Giving the other party the opportunity to speak out and tell us all he wanted to share and trying to show the utmost attention and interest to his words makes the opposite side listen attentively to everything that we say. The conversation will bring a mutual pleasure in that case.

Who should give way and become a first listener? The French proverb says that if soldiers of the same title meet the smartest salutes first.

So, if we want us to be heard, we must listen to others.

Gleb is writing articles on different subjects including music. Come visit his latest website about fender cd 60 and fender cd 100 guitars.

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